Just trying to change the world, one blogpost at a time.


31 December 2016

Understanding.



I will be more understanding.

"You don't have to agree with someone to see where they are coming from."

Understanding is one of those beautiful traits that unfortunately isn't found in everyone. To understand someone is not easy. It requires you to be able to see past your own opinions and place yourself in another person's mind. Have you ever been in a situation where you're having a discussion and what the other person is saying is completely crazy to you?
Imagine this for example. There is a piece of paper being held up between two people, they can each see one side. To person A the paper is red, to person B the paper is blue. When asked what colour the piece of paper is, who will give the right answer? This is a simple illustration to show that we all see the world in different ways and there isn't necessarily one right answer or one right way to go about doing things.

Our experiences, surroundings, goals, and perceptions paint the world in a particular way. It's important to build the ability to step back and consider the world might look a little different to someone else. An example I've found to be quite common recently is differences on the opinion of marriage. Whilst I and many people I know have it mind as something amazing, I have met a number of people who don't see the point; often because from their perspective marriage has always ended in divorce or one party cheating or something to that effect. Their experience of it, and how it's been to them has lead to their opinion whilst I've seen many loving marriages and have another view on the matter. We can't always expect people to see things in the same way we do, and in fact we shouldn't want them to. Differences in opinion are healthy and can help us gain further understanding on different situations. Sometimes someone disagreeing with you only makes you believe in what you think even more. 

In a conversation or argument, take the time to listen instead of just thinking about your next point? Where are they coming from? If you don't understand maybe ask what lead to them thinking the way they do. You may find that their reasoning allows you to see things differently or perhaps once you find the root of their opinion you can show them why you disagree. It's much more effective that just having a opinion battle. In the same token, with maturity comes the ability to agree to disagree without any hard feelings. It takes a lot of self-assurance even though it may seem like the easy way out sometimes. It means that you have the restraint to not impose your opinion on someone else and and can respect them as a person even though you disagree on certain things.

It is the case however, that not everyone will make the effort to understand you. It doesn't matter. Be the bigger person and lead by example. 

Stay Blessed,
Selorm xo.

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