Just trying to change the world, one blogpost at a time.


7 August 2016

The Unknown.


Hola peeps!
It's been a while... after my holiday it took me a min to get back into the swing of things!
Greece was incredible; great people, great food, and just great vibes overall. At some point I'll put up a sort of travel diary of pictures since I'm hoping to do a lot more travelling, perhaps in a post or a widget of some sort. But anyway whilst I had the time of my life, being out there just got me thinking, well thinking even more I should say, about what comes next!

I don't know if this is just me but when I was a kid, the future didn't seem to be a big thing. In my head you'd basically just work, have a family, and the best part would be having the money and freedom to do whatever you wanted. Like I really thought once I had £200 I was set and I'd buy all the trainers in the world (hardcore tomboy). But now, given that there's at least 60 years of life left, God willing, I'm extra curious as to what comes next, perhaps putting way to much pressure on the idea of things happening a certain way.

Which country will I live in?
When will I get married/will I get married at all?
Is my current dream actually what I'm supposed to be focused on?
Will I ever reach 5ft5?

We all have questions about the future, about how things will pan out. I guess the beauty of life is that at any moment things could change and you could find yourself on an adventure that you didn't even imagine. On the flipside, there's always a chance that things could change for the worst. Whilst fear of the unknown is understandable, it only leads to anxiety, stress and way too many eaten tubs of Ben&Jerry's. Contrarily having too much excitement about things happening a particular way can also be detrimental if it then leads to disappointment. So, what's the best way to go about it?
Well today, my mum reiterated a point that I'd heard before and have subconsciously in mind, but definitely needed a reminder of:

Control what you can, don't worry about what you can't!

Simple.
As people, there are many factors that affect the way our lives turn out, but ultimately we only have control of ourselves - what we do, what we say etc. Everything else is down to other people, to weather, timing, availability and ultimately to God himself. There is absolutely no point in fretting over a decision you have no control over - simply do what you can and leave the rest to God. This is true in practically every situation. If you have a job interview, do all the preparation you can, get a good night's sleep but once it's done the decision isn't in your hands anymore so there's no point stressing about it. In friendships, relationships, or even business partnerships, you can only control how you manage your part. Put in as much effort as possible and think about what you can do on your side to improve things - if all parties do that then the overall relationship is strengthened, otherwise you may have to walk away. Your health, happiness and peace of mind are generally down to you and other people cannot take responsibility for them. Focus on what you can control today - everything else is irrelevant and only adds extra stress that you don't need. I'm definitely guilty of worrying about things that aren't even close to happening and end up laughing of myself because it's so silly - like whether my 2nd child's partner is going to want to have Christmas dinner away from us haha - like seriously?! Whilst life is incredibly complicated it's also pretty simple - do what you can and then let the chips fall where they may. 

Everyday we go to bed, unsure of what tomorrow will bring, and who knows, in 5, 10, 25 years your life could be nothing like you pictured it to be and you know what... that's quite alright!
Have goals, have dreams, but be flexible about the means and the time frame. Stop focusing on how long it takes to get there and just get there! Things will work out just as they're supposed to :)

Stay Blessed,
Selorm. 

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